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Friday, February 24, 2017

Sean Johnson rejoins Spartans!

New York, NY: With its 7th round draft pick the Spartans chose veteran goalkeeper Sean Johnson, making his return to the club after three seasons away complete. Johnson, who kept the net for the Sparts during the 2012 and 2013 season is still the highest producing goalkeeper in club history, with 14 regular season points for the club. Welcome back Sean!


Wednesday, February 22, 2017

SpartanKit 2017

New York, NY: With a known preference for flamboyance, the Chairman has released the SpartanKit for 2017 season. The kit was chosen because Lotto, who hasn't been seen in the states since 1996, gave the chairman a great deal on the new kits. 


First Round Pick - Moralez

New York, NY: Today the club signed the "mighty midget" Maxi Moralez. Moralez, who stands a towering 5'3" and with a weight of a teenage prom queen, comes to NY from Leon in the Mexican Liga MX. Moralez joins DP's Clint Dempsey, Ola Kamara, and Diego Fagundez on the Spartans front line. It is rumored that the club has installed a new "kiddie" urinal in the locker room in advance of Moralez' arrival.


Tuesday, February 21, 2017

2017 Season Preparations Underway


New York, NY. After two seasons at the bottom of the table and consideration by the chairman to end his misery and sell the club, preparations are underway for a new season for the club. In a drastic move, the Chairman did not renew the DP contract for Graham Zusi, who is the clubs all time scoring leader and one of the clubs first two players in the expansion draft for its initial season. Clint Dempsey, who was injured for a large portion of the 2016 season returns as a Designated Player, Diego Fagundez, who was the clubs Retention player for 2016 returns as a DP, and Ola Kamara, the lone Spartan with a promising 2016 season returns under a shiny new DP contract. In addition, the club retained promising youngster, Kekuta Manneh as the firm's Retention Player, and acquired the rights to Tommy McNamara for the lone Re-Entry Player spot. The draft starts on Thursday. 


Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Requiem for a season

Sitting in dead last in both the league and cup, the Chairman hasn't been seen in weeks. It was assumed that he was off on his yacht not thinking about soccer until today, when he placed a phone call to his general manager and instructed him to drop his first round pick, Octavio Rivero, who left the league, and Oalex Anderson, who still needs time to mature, in exchange for two injured players, Kekuta Manneh (foot) and Darren Mattocks (hamstring).

Clearly, the Chairman is looking past being competitive in the remaining games this season and is looking forward to possible DP or retention player slots this season.

Sitting at a measly 2.2 goal per game average, nothing has gone right for the Spartans this year, with the exception of his deft pick of Ola Kamara in the late rounds of the draft. This was reminiscent of the BWP pick from the 2013 season, an unknown player at the time who went on to win the Golden Boot.

The clubs aging DP duo of Clint Dempsey and Graham Zusi have been largely ineffective this year, and it is unclear what the Chairman plans to do with them.


Transaction Announced

Add: Kekuta Manneh
Add: Darren Mattocks

Drop: Octavio Rivero
Drop: Oalex Anderson